defendure | FOLKMORE INBOX.

[ There's enough fucked up guilt shit between them already for a lifetime. They definitely don't need to go around collecting more...although Izuku's expression is a study in flustered and surprised and nervous and a million other things.

Holy shit. Katsuki's talking about having sex. Or are least giving him a hand job. Maybe reciprocal? ]

- You - you want to, um - you want to like - ?

(It was the responsible thing to do. They could keep ignoring it and ignoring it until it became too much to ignore, but Katsuki didn't want to risk that. He didn't want to put either of them in that position. Yeah, it was embarrassing as hell, but he valued his friendship with Izuku more than he valued some bullshit of self-perseverance when it came to his ego surrounding sex.

It's not like he cared about sex. He was too honed in on hero work to even think about dating. The only times he has ever jerked off in his life were quick, to the point, and just to release a bit of tension. He never made a production out of his sexuality the way like fucking Kaminari and Mineta did. Sex just didn't matter to him like that. He never fantasized about his first time (though he certainly had some wet dreams...involving...someone...sitting in the same room as him right now...). It just wasn't an issue for him. Not even a fantasy.

He just always figured it would happen when it happened and if it never happened, he didn't give a shit.

So to him? This wasn't worth possible tension or damage to their relationship. It was just getting off. People had sex with friends all of the time. If anything, he'd prefer it in this case.)

Yes. (He answers so easily. He sits back and finally closes his legs a little, feeling a bit more confident now that he has begun. He crosses his arms over his chest and stares ahead.)

I would rather do it with you than lose my mind and have some fuckin' perv come along. And I would rather you do that too. You're the naive kind of dumbass who would just- (He growls a little bit and squeezes his eyes shut.)

I just don't want either of us to get put in that situation. At least if we promise to stick this out together with each other, we can have some control on our side.

[ Has Katsuki thought about that much? About Izuku losing his head and having sex with someone else. Because...fair, considering the lightning event.

Izuku feels like maybe his heart is pounding out of his chest. Or maybe it actually stopped beating entirely? Can both of those things happen at the same time? Holy fuck.

He's...never thought about sex that much. Occasionally? In a vague way? But now it's right...here. In front of him. ]

I, um. I don't want my first time to be...helping you. While you're out of your mind.

(Truthfully, it was the lightning event that made him start realizing this danger extended beyond their feeding sessions, yes. It was one thing for Katsuki to lay there in agony with a boner for four hours, but it was something else realizing Izuku might get whammied by some bizarre horny lightning in public where anyone could come across him.

Nope.

He wouldn't want that to happen to any of his friends, but with Izuku, it went a hell of a lot deeper. Because he sure wouldn't offer this solution to just anyone but he doesn't need to think about that.

He looks over at Izuku when he speaks up, looking somewhat surprised.)

I don't want my first time to be that either. (So...) I'd prefer it if it was just us...(A vague gesture between them.) Being us.

[ He's about to short circuit. Izuku buries his face in his hands so he doesn't. Self combust. Is that a thing? He feels like it might be a thing, his cheeks are so hot. ]

I, um. So if we're going to. Um. B-being pragmatic is one thing but, um. Uh.

[ Oh God this is agonizingly awkward. ]

This is...not how I pictured, um.

(Katsuki was proud about how well he was doing this entire time. Really, he was. Then Izuku just...keeps talking!

He can feel himself starting to heat up because, well, he figures that Izuku meant he didn't picture his first time with Katsuki specifically. There's no helping that and he's not surprised even if he feels the most annoying amount of - something! Negative! He's not going to examine that too closely right now.)

What. Is it 'cause I'm a guy? (Yes, let's go with the safe route here. Izuku being straight was at least...kind of expected. So.)

Huh? I don't - I don't know, I - it was never that descriptive.

[ More...vague. And this isn't what he meant specifically about their genders although now he's distracted. ]

Is...is me being a guy okay?

(Katsuki stares at Izuku for a second before he winds up looking away. It's not something he ever figured he would tell anyone. Not for a desire to keep it secret but mostly because he felt it was absolutely no one's business. But asking Izuku to sleep with him did make it Izuku's business directly.

So. He scratches his arm for the sake of doing something with his hands.)

I don't like girls like that. If I was going to do this, it was always going to be with a guy. (In other words? Izuku's gender was absolutely not an issue for him.)

Oh! Oh, well, um. I don't think it's an issue for me.

[ At least that isn't the part that's making his brain stutter he doesn't think. ]

I just, uh, pictured it after like...going on a date. With like. Candles and music.

Okay.

(So. Okay. So- then Izuku didn't mind him being a guy. That fries half of Katsuki's basic brain capacity and the rest goes with Izuku explaining the rest of his...Expectation. Which is really so fucking predictable.)

...Candles and music. Seriously? (He's not...making fun of him exactly. He's just giving him an exasperated look.)

[ At least he didn't bring up flowers. Izuku is still hiding his face thank you he's safe here behind his hands. ]

I! I just always thought it w-would be something like that. Doesn't it seem too - too clinical otherwise??

(He sighs quietly, closing his eyes and just- allowing himself to accept that this was their new reality, apparently. It's so tempting to just make fun of Izuku but even Katsuki realized now wasn't the time.

Plus he can't deny that he didn't want it to be overly clinical either. He wasn't as sentimental as Izuku and he was far from a romantic, but he wasn't completely heartless. His sense of pride was on the line and he didn't actually like the idea of it being a bad first time for Izuku. If they were going to do this then he at least kind of wanted to do it right.)

Okay. Candles and music. (He's agreeing. He leans back against the couch, throwing an arm over his own eyes because this was so...much.)

And dancing. If we're having the music we might as well. You've been getting better at it anyway.

[ They are now sitting on their couch both of them covering their faces as they sit there, blushing like the dumb virgins they are. Refusing to look at one another.

...They're making some sort of progress, maybe. ]

Is there...is there anything you pictured that you want?

(At least neither of them had run away from the conversation! They weren't ...fighting! This is progress. God knows they would have never been able to have this conversation even a few months ago.)

I never really pictured anything. (Even Izuku knew that people didn't confess to Katsuki even if they did have a crush on him. Katsuki wasn't the sort of guy who had been banking on physical intimacy anytime soon in his life.

But there's this heavy pause as he contemplates if there actually was anything he cared about. His face heats up a bit more because...well...)

No. Just you. (Because that's not transparent or anything.)

[ Izuku assumes Katsuki means right here and now he only planned for Izuku to be his partner because...they're not strangers. So. It's transparent but Izuku has a blind spot. ]

When...um, when did you want to?

(Some part of him hadn't expected to actually get this far. He rubs at his arm.)

Preferably before you have to feed next. I don't mind helping you with that, but it...hurts. (Repressing his sexual interest hurts, he means.)

You know how guys do it, right?

W-well, yeah, I'm not completely dumb, Kacchan...

[ He's sixteen, cut him some slack, he definitely knows how gay sex works. And straight sex. ]

I know you're not stupid, Deku. A lot of guys don't know. It's fair to ask. (Bless Katsuki - he doesn't even sound annoyed, surprisingly enough.)

What would you be more comfortable doing? I don't care either way who does who. (Listen. He's fingered himself before, okay, he's not put off by the idea of bottoming.)

Oooooh my god.

[ Oh god. That is a thing Katsuki just asked, seriously, and it is a thing Izuku has to consider, seriously. Like. Which of them puts their dick in the other person's ass! That is a thing!!!! They are going to do!!!!!!!

It is quite possible all the blood in his body is in his face right now. ]

(Katsuki winds up staring at Izuku and he wants to rip the damn nerd's head off for having the audacity to look like that just now.)

What the hell's with that face?!

W-we're talking about having sex!

[ HE CAN'T HELP IT THIS IS JUST A BIG DEAL FOR HIM if Katsuki expected to get through this without Izuku making a huge deal about things, do I have news for him. ]

I-I-I just - I mean - thinking about it - isn't it kind of, er - saying what I want is a little...

(It's a big deal to Katsuki too! He's just not as dorky about it!

He's not that surprised but he's still going to give Izuku the most unimpressed look in the entire world!)

What?! Spit it out and stop with your damn muttering!

I, um, that is. [ That's still muttering. ]

...Y-you're not gonna make fun of me, are you?

(Oh good lord. He does not have the patience for this bullshit. Still. He takes a deep breath and tries not to scream.)

No. Deku. I'm not going to fuckin' make fun of you. I can roast your stupid ass for a million other things. I'm not gonna do it with this. So. Just, say whatever the hell you want.

[ Oh, okay. He can do this! He can. Totally do this... ]

Ithinkmyweirdvampirebodywantstotakeintheotherkindoffluidtoo.

[ Good luck, Kacchan. ]

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject